Sunday, March 23, 2008
IT'S FINALLY DONE MARLY-CHAN =D
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okok, i apologize to mar-chan for not posting up the fic on yesterday like promised.... gomen-neh... pls dun come after me wif a spork D= ... well anyways, i had a bad case of writer's block this morning, thus i completed the story only now. and my mum was around yesterday, so i couldnt type the smut... so, yeah, gomen, forgive me... T_T
warning... contains heavy yaoi... yadda yadda yadda small prints and such... rated NC-17 for bloody gore and graphic-ish smut.... not for the faint of heart...
its a kakuzu x hidan fic, yeah.....
tittle - Happy Birthday Jackass
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Hidan sighed; it was Kakuzu's birthday and he didn't know what to get for the miser. Luckily for him, Kakuzu was out on a Jashin-damned mission and won't be back until evening, and that gave him time to think. But still, with time on his side, he couldn't think of one single thing to give the Akatsuki banker. He had spent three fucking weeks thinking about what to give the banker, and still he couldn't find a good present. He brushed his hand through his well-gelled hair in frustration as he sat down on the damned couch.
Deidara, who noticed the unusual change in the Jashinist's mood, sat down beside him on the couch as he began to speak, "Hidan, what's wrong, un?"
"It's Kakuzu's birthday today and I don't fucking know what to get for him..." Hidan stated; he would surely love some help from his current predicament.
"Oh? Hmm...what about..." Deidara paused and whispered something into Hidan's ear.
Hidan blushed, "Fucking been there, done that..."
Deidara giggled, "Ooh, Hidan-kun is a naughty boy."
"TOBI IS A GOOD BOY!" Tobi shouted from the end of the hall way.
"What the--- TOBI GET YOUR FUCKING ASS OUT OF HERE!" Hidan screamed, afraid that Tobi would hear anything he was not supposed to.
"Okay Hidan-senpai, Tobi is a good boy and will do what Tobi is told!" Tobi smiled as he went out of the room – probably wanting to find Zetsu to tell him what a good boy Tobi was...
Deidara giggled as he began thinking of ways to help the Jashinist. Then, an idea struck him. "Hey Hidan, I think I know what you can get for Kakuzu-san."
The zealot literally jumped, "What the fuck for real!?"
Deidara nodded, "You love pain right? –Hidan nodded– and you love Kakuzu right? –Hidan nodded again– so..." Deidara whispered into Hidan's ear again.
This time, the Jashinist turned beet red, "Y-You mean---"
"Un!" Deidara exclaimed triumphantly, giggling slightly. "I'm sure both you and Kakuzu-san will enjoy it more than anything, un," he replied, a huge smile plastered on his face. Oh he was so proud of himself for thinking of such a thing...
Hidan groaned, oh well... "Worth a fucking shot..." he grumbled.
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Kakuzu made his way back to his room. He was tired as hell and his clothes were all stained with blood from his mission. He wanted to have a good bath and go to bed already...but alas, his life was not that good. He still needed to report to Pein-sama, and Pein was an impatient guy... very, very impatient... He sighed.
He opened the door to his room...and his jaw dropped.
Hidan was lying on the bed, wearing nothing but a pair of black boxers and in his hand was a kunai. "Kuzu..." Hidan called out, voice filled with lust.
"Hidan what the hell...?"
"It's your fucking birthday jack ass." Hidan stated, licking his lips.
"But I...h-have to...report to..." Kakuzu paused; he was finding it hard to concentrate on speaking. After all, Hidan was lying on the bed in nothing but a pair of boxers... and yeah, you get the drift.
"Kuzu...c'mon...please Kuzu? Please, please, please...
pwease?"
Kakuzu mentally cursed the Jashinist. He wasn't sure how Pein would take 'I was busy fucking Hidan' as an answer, but heck, Hidan said '
pwease' ... and it was, his birthday after all, shouldn't he be enjoying himself? He sighed; screw reporting to Pein, Hidan was his first priority now. "You're an ass you know that?" he said as he walked towards the bed.
Hidan smirked, "Of course, and you're the dick."
Kakuzu laughed, "Horny today, much?"
"Aw c'mon, I waited for the whole fucking day for you to come home," Hidan pouted.
"Patience, Hidan, patience...."
Hidan smiled –albeit too innocently– as he handed Kakuzu the kunai, "I'm fucking sure you know what I want you to do..." he purred into Kakuzu's ear.
Kakuzu shivered as Hidan licked the tip of his ears. "No I don't..." he muttered out.
"...Kuzu! You know Jashin-damned well what it is!" Hidan snapped, pouting his lips slightly.
"I don't," he repeated, "tell me..."
Hidan glared at Kakuzu before snatching the kunai out of his hand. He stabbed the kunai onto his left shoulder and blood immediately poured out. "This is what I damn well want you to do, happy?"
Hidan received a kiss for an answer. Kakuzu gently licked Hidan's bottom lip and Hidan gladly gave entrance. He moaned as Kakuzu's hot tongue roamed in his mouth and Kakuzu smirked into the kiss, happy with the reaction he got. As they broke apart, desperate for air, Kakuzu took out the kunai on the Jashinist's shoulder and began to cut patterns on Hidan's left hand. Hidan gasped as he felt hard metal cutting through his skin, "Oh Jashin...don't stop..."
Kakuzu did the same with the other hand as blood stained the sheets, occasionally gently lapping the blood away with his tongue. Then he paused for awhile, examining his work, adding a few finishing touches here and there. He then proceeded to Hidan's chest, slowly carving in the words 'Kakuzu x Hidan forever', making sure that the Jashinist was enjoying every second of the pain. Hidan was moaning the whole time, obviously enjoying it. After that was done, he tugged at Hidan's boxers, trying to the offending piece of clothing off. But at the position Hidan was currently in he couldn't pull it off; instead he used the kunai and ripped it apart. Hidan hissed as the cool air brushed against his already hard member and groaned, rocking his hip against Kakuzu's, earning moans from both of them. "I'm not done yet, Hidan," Kakuzu murmured, trying to regain his composure and once again started on carving patterns onto the Jashinist.
"M-More..." Hidan pleaded softly, pushing up his body against Kakuzu.
"Of course, I'm not done yet..." Kakuzu stated. He pulled up Hidan's bleeding hand and looked at it. "Your fingernails need colour," he muttered, taking the kunai and digging it under the fingernail, gouging it out. Hidan screamed with delight as blood flowed out of his fingers as Kakuzu repeated the task with every single one of the Jashinist's fingers. Hidan was in so much pain, he was in heaven.
"Make me silent Kuzu... I don't fucking want anyone to find us..." Hidan begged.
"As you wish," Kakuzu said, cutting a small slit on Hidan's Adam's apple, drawing out a slight amount of blood. However, it was effective and Hidan fell silent, only able to let out bursts of air when he tried to talk.
Kakuzu slowly crawled back down and scrapped the kunai on Hidan's inner thigh, causing flakes of skin to fall off. Then, he stabbed the kunai through Hidan's knee, breaking the bones. Hidan opened his mouth to scream, but nothing came out. Hidan smiled weakly at Kakuzu, silently begging him to go on. Kakuzu complied and drew patterns on Hidan's thighs, causing blood to pour yet again. He stabbed Hidan's right hip socket, crippling Hidan's right leg, making it unable to move. He then did the same to the other hip socket, feeling the cartilage separate as the kunai pushed deeper in. Hidan bit his lip, causing it to bleed. He was enjoying the pain that was spreading through him like a wildfire. He shuddered when he felt Kakuzu's tongue move up and down his member, slowly taking the whole thing into his mouth, making it warm and wet. Kakuzu scrapped his teeth against it, making very soft skin fall off, causing it to bleed slightly. Kakuzu swirled his tongue around it, making the marks sting against the acid from his saliva. Hidan couldn't have wanted more.
"Unnnh..." Hidan moaned as Kakuzu pulled out. He was getting his voice back. He shot Kakuzu a look that literally read, 'make it quick.' Kakuzu complied, lifting up both of Hidan's legs and putting them on his shoulder. He pushed the kunai into Hidan's entrance, causing Hidan to make a cat-like purr. Hidan shuddered as the cold metal brushed against his prostate, making him moan. Kakuzu then pulled out the blood covered kunai, licking it clean. "Q-Quick..." Hidan managed to groan.
Without warning, Kakuzu thrust into the Jashinist, making him cry out in pain. "Thanks for the warning, jack ass..." Hidan muttered sarcastically. Kakuzu smirked, "Come on, admit it, you like it when I do that." Hidan pouted but refused to answer. He shivered as he felt Kakuzu sink deep in before rocking into him slowly. After awhile, Kakuzu managed to find a steady pace and was slamming in fast and hard into the Jashinist, making him see stars with every well aimed thrust. "A-Ah...Kuzu...d-don't...stop...faster...harder," Hidan moaned.
"Ka...k-kaku.."
"Say it," Kakuzu muttered, thrusting in harder than usual.
"Kakuzu!" Hidan screamed as he came all over their stomach. Kakuzu grunted and gave a few more thrusts before coming deep within his lover. Kakuzu collapsed beside Hidan, completely spent. They stayed like that for a while, Hidan then turned to face Kakuzu, kissing him on the lips. Kakuzu gladly returned the kiss, sticking his tongue into Hidan's mouth. They hesitantly broke apart from air, desperately trying to catch their breath. "Happy birthday, jackass..." Hidan muttered, snuggling close to Kakuzu. "I love you, Hidan," Kakuzu breathed, wrapping an arm protectively around Hidan, "This was the best birthday present ever..." Hidan smiled as he let sleep wash over him.
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DONE =D ...i fail at smut... *crawls into emo corner and dies* im really sorry mar-chan for letting this drag so long... and its not GOOD quality... T__T it SUCKS.... zzz oh well, hope you like it, if not... u can kill me for all i care. blah. and lol, hurray for randomly shouting tobi XD that was like the best part (other than the smut) to me ^^ had fun writting this... but the end result sucked.. so, yeah... bleah. i'd gladly take any request from anyone =D oh right and dont ask me how hidan got his voice back, i dont effin know. i mean, it was just a small cut... he should be able to regain his voice? ... o_0 i dunnoe. oh and...
disclaimer : i do not own kakuzu or hidan nor naruto. if i did, the whole naruto anime would be filled with yaoi.
peace out~! <333
- regie satans! ave satans! hail satan! - 3:56 PM
